May 19, 2006

they will forget what you said, they will forget what you did,

... but they will never forget how you made them feel.

Ever had that feeling (of such overwhelming frustration) that whatever you’re saying doesn’t reach others? That your words make absolutely no sense for them?
Did u try harder? Searched for better words, more words, bigger words? Did u lose your temper? Did u try a sideway? A backdoor? A trick?
Did u doubt urself, ur own arguments, reasons, motives? Did u feel stupid? Did u give up? Did u leave? Smack the door on ur way out? Did u say “I respect ur point-of-view, but…”; or maybe “u’re not listening to me!”
Is this a misunderstanding? I don’t think so.
In fact, I find ‘understanding’ to be a smoke screen. Psychologically speaking – a dangerous, devious, defense mechanism. Plainly speaking – a curtain that keeps every one of us away from our true selves and true interactions with other.
Shall I explain? Our minds (thought processes) search for relations between objects. They compare stuff and come up with similarities and differences, they help by finding common grounds and differentiators,
and such we basically invented ‘reason’, or ‘common sense’ and ‘objectivity’. (they don't really exist as outside, objective realities)
Common sense is a nice gadget. I can depend on it whenever I need to make a quick survey in my mind: “what’s the majority going to think about this?”. Of course, as we’ve already established last time, majorities don’t think. They find short-cuts and follow them with the candor of a 2 year old. Not our fault really, we were trained that way. But ONE should always know better, because ONE can think for oneself.
Can we actually trust our minds? I don’t think so. For once, they use a limited set of tools, one that’s basically a deal made with other people: “listen from now on, we’ll call this 'word' so that we’ll both know what we’re talking about. From now on”.
But what each of us actually understands of 'word' is such a different matter, isn’t it? Everything we are gets in the way, and we simply ignore it for the sake of … simplicity? And yet, if you think about it, ur thought processes are not that dependable, are they? How many times have u changed ur mind? How many time have u realized u were wrong or have been proven wrong? How many mistakes have u made? How do you clear confusion, how do u translate jokes and word-games, how do u stop a paradox?
If reason is such a sure thing, how come we have words like that?